Written October 16th:
Usually when I attend church on Sunday I understand about a fourth or what is being said and I start to fade halfway through the service. (Our pastor kindly bought me Dr. Pepper for the snack shack though so the past few weeks I have bought some caffeine to sustain me when my brain shuts down from translating.) But this week I understood over half of the message from the traveling pastor and God knew what parts of church today I needed to understand because every time I knew what was going on He spoke to me.
ONE. For starters worship was incredible and the songs (though in Spanish) really spoke to me. Here they are in English...
“Now is the Time to Worship:”
♫ Come, now is the time to worship.
Come, now is the time to give your heart.
Come, just as you are to worship.
Come, just as you are before our God.
One day every tongue with confess you are God.
One day every knee will bow.
Still the greatest treasure remains for those,
who gladly serve you now. ♫
How could I sing this song when I don’t gladly serve the Lord even now? My heart longs for every knee to bow to the Lord and for everyone to experience God’s love. But I myself am not bowing to the Lord. I am resisting God instead of experiencing His love and providence. If I am unwilling to serve Him how can I expect other people to be lead to serve Him?
“Cuanto Nos Ama:”
♫ And all of a sudden I am unaware,
of these afflictions eclipsed by glory.
And I realize just how beautiful you are
and how great you affections are for me.
Oh how He loves.
How He loves us. ♫
Compared to God’s glory my struggle with following the Lord seems small and pointless. The Lord loves me (and you) more than anything. And that is all I really need to know. God’s love and glory is all that really matters. I just need to believe that.
TWO. The visiting pastor was from Oaxaca, a place in Southern Mexico with a large indigenous population, and he showed a video of his family’s ministry with those local ethnic groups. After seeing the video I wrote this in my journal:
“Ethnic groups. Is that it? Is that where you have my heart? I felt you move in my heart when they showed pictures of the ethnic, local groups in Oaxaca. Is it not so much Haiti as it is the poor, out of the way, ethnic groups that you are calling me to? The 10-40 window groups? Indigenous groups? What was your purpose in moving my heart so suddenly and strongly towards those people? I sense it was not for nothing.”
THREE. God convicted me in today’s message with this question, “Who is the King on the throne of you life?” Matthew 6:19 says, “Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in Heaven.” Not my will be done, but God’s will be done. God’s kingdom, not Stephanie’s kingdom, come. God’s will is already being done in Heaven, so who am I to say that God can’t have his will done in my life on earth?
Who belongs on the throne? Solo Dios.